Are you waiting until you feel like forgiving someone? Maybe your anger about being mistreated unfairly has led to

  • “pitbull anger” to lash out at others;
  • “cobra anger” that is deep, down, and slow; or could you have
  • “rattlesnake syndrome” where you bite yourself that perpetuates the venom of bitterness within you.

Listen to Dr. Erwin Lutzer expose the dangers of bitterness in this audio “Just Lay It Down – Part 2 of 2.”

Part of the recovery to overcome a root of bitterness is to grieve the loss. As John Greenleaf Whittier wrote in a poem called “Maud Muller,”
“Of all the words of tongue and pen,
The saddest of these is
It might have been.”

Reconcile and Reverse by Avoiding the Blame Game

The Blame Game: Reversing the Negative Cycle of Blame

The “blame game” is when individuals or groups point fingers at others to avoid taking responsibility for their actions or mistakes. It often involves shifting the focus away from your own shortcomings, leading to a cycle where no one takes ownership of their issues.

We often do not have all the facts.

This can happen in various settings, from personal relationships to workplaces, and can result in conflict, defensiveness, and a lack of progress. Instead of addressing the real problem, energy is spent assigning fault, which prevents any meaningful solutions or growth from occurring.

Bitterness, often born from unresolved resentment or anger, can have deeply negative effects on your emotional and physical well-being. Emotionally, bitterness can fester over time, leading to chronic negativity, mistrust, and disconnection from others. When people hold on to past hurts, they find it harder to experience joy or gratitude, impacting their mental health and relationships. Physically, ongoing bitterness can contribute to stress, which in turn may lead to issues like high blood pressure, insomnia, or a weakened immune system. It’s a heavy emotional burden that can prevent healing and hinder one’s ability to move forward or find peace.

  • “Let all bitterness, wrath, and anger, and clamor, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice.” Ephesians 4:31
  • “See to it that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many.” Hebrews 12:15